the one about struggling to begin again.

WE ALL HAVE to begin somewhere, and in late 2008 I remember how pleased I was to be accepted into the Old Swiss Inn as night shift barkeep and daytime waiter. Yes, you read that right - a server.

But I have never been more happier.

Here was a place where nobody knew me or my family or whence it was I came from. Here was a place where I could just be me, or be the person I fashioned myself most to be.  Here was a place I could start over.  Here was a place where I could drown out the noise of my everyday living.

Here was a place I could be stripped down and out of the many layers of what people assume me to be, sans questions of how I feel or who I am really, deep down inside.  Here was a place where no one could judge me, for the restaurant is always busy and nobody could spare the time to look into one's soul and declare it to be unworthy.

Here, finally, is my sanctuary, I remember telling myself.

And for days I would accept all tasks and shifts the restaurant manager and the operations manager would throw my way.  They thought I was being a martyr but I would do most everything in my power not to feel, not to think, not to lay down in bed and grieve and feel sorry for myself and do silly things as sleep with the landlord's son and the landlord himself, and perhaps even half the dorm's residents.

Here was a chance to begin anew.




Fast forward to ten years later.

Here's to 2018. And all the promises it brings. Hello again, everyone, It is an amazing day today, and I am back.





______________________

Listening to: Stranded  by Jennifer Paige

The music video features Paige finding herself stranded on an isolated island where her car runs out of fuel and she ends up wandering in the beaches all alone. The video was shot in Spain and directed by David Mould.