suitcase of memories, the digital photos kind

IT ALL STARTED with the want to archive them digital files. I recently purchased this external hard drive and took to the task, quite immediately (the old Samsung already screaming notifications upon notifications that I should delete files already - it's running on a mere 8G of free space. But I digress.).

Anyway, I cheerfully started out organizing everything. I deleted installers, old programs I do not use, and ebooks.

And then I got to the photos. And because I use both Picasa and Google Drive, everything's taggable - by date, or category.  I allowed myself the entire week to finish this.
I felt I have traveled, seen, and loved enough. And if ever, in the future, I travel, see, and love some more, how will whatever is new compare to whatever is old?
But, as I was digging through files after files, call me sentimental, but I sort of got... a lot sad.

Here I am, a forward-thinking person, one who thought himself quite immune to nostalgia, sifting through photos of a life well-lived ... and still can't help but grow a lot sentimental.

I even had to play faster tunes to help things along.

Looking at these collections, I felt I have traveled, seen, and loved enough.  Mia said I haved loved for about 5 lifetimes, experienced more than the average Joe.  And if ever, in the future, I travel, see, and love some more, how will whatever is new compare to whatever is old?

Ahhh. I do not even know why I ask this.  One shouldn't compare really.  And for the most part, I have been unsentimental, really.

But then I got to our pictures. Your photos. You smile at me from an era long ago, back when I was a fool and you were silly enough to believe with whatever it was Life threw at us.  And I thought  -- while the photos were wonderful  -- how photos could be a lot unfair, not being able to capture feelings, context, and the us of that time.

I really ought to journal more. Because I find I am left with just photographs, a few notes, and some email and Viber exchanges, to remember you by. And this, I want to remember, when I am old and hopeless, and filled with regrets.

This is what I get for just trying to be a bit more, tidy, for wanting to Konmari the digital photos archive.  I think this is the low-level equivalent of moving homes, something I have done more than a dozen times in my short life.

Upheaval never gets easy, even with frequency, and constant practice, it seems. And excuse me for abandoning this project for a while. I cannot do this properly, now.


MEANWHILE, Empoy's film is getting rave reviews, and someone amazing agreed to come with me as I go down to see it.


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Listening to: Close to Me by D'Sound